


A Very Merry Preacher Christmas

by StrangeBlueGlow



Category: Preacher (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Christmas, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 14:08:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8983996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StrangeBlueGlow/pseuds/StrangeBlueGlow
Summary: Christmastime settles upon Annville, Texas. It goes about as you’d expect it to. A series of vignettes.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [Preacher Secret Santa](http://preachersecretsanta.tumblr.com/) as a gift to my giftee: the fandom in general. Happy Holidays, y’all! This is set in a nifty little canon divergence AU that splits off at the Saturday night in the episode Sundowner where nothing (and no one) goes to hell and life just goes on for a bit, and also pretends that the season was set much closer to Christmas than it probably actually was.

Cassidy barely registered hearing couple of loud thuds against the attic door, followed by some metallic clicking and creaking, then footsteps on the attic floorboards. The displeased throat clearing, though, did finally wake him. The vampire cracked one eye open, then the other, letting the lovely - or at least it would be if it wasn’t contorted into such a frown at the moment - face of Emily come into focus. “You know if you keep barging in like that, one of these days I might not be so decent as I am now,” he teased with a lazy grin and a stretch that was as much to quickly check that he hadn’t left any drugs, paraphernalia, or pornography in plain sight on the half deflated air mattress when he’d passed out the night before as it was to actually stretch, “Unless that’s what you were after all along, in which case all you’ve gotta do is ask.”

Emily, somehow, managed to look even less amused. “The Christmas decorations are up here,” she explained, while charitably ignoring the copy of Hustler on the floor next to Cassidy’s bed, “You can help me get them up today.”

“Today?” Cassidy whined, reluctantly sitting upright, “You know, I was gonna-”

“Yes, today,” Emily interjected in a tone that left no room for argument, “It’s after Thanksgiving, people are gonna come to church tomorrow expecting it to be decorated for Christmas.”

Cassidy narrowed his eyes thoughtfully, then nodded. “Right, right. Christmas, church, Jesus. Makes sense.” He stretched some more before standing and smiling at Emily again. “Jesse gettin’ in on this, too? It’s after… Christ, what is the law in this state? Seven is it? It’s after then, though, right? Could head down to the store, get some booze and some egg nog, make a party outta it.”

Emily frowned just slightly at that, which was an improvement on her facial expression, actually. “I don’t know, he isn’t awake yet, but I doubt it. I think last year the only thing he did was put the wreath up out front, and he only did that because I didn’t want me on that rickety ladder.”

“Padre isn’t into the whole holiday thing? We’ll have to see about fixing that,” he muttered half to himself before refocusing his smile on Emily. “Well, point me in the direction of the decorations and give me a wee bit o’privacy to get dressed for the day, and we’ll get on it.”

“They’re in the boxes over there marked ‘X-mas’.” Emily pointed to a stack of boxes just to Cassidy’s left, clearly labeled in thick red marker. Her tone was less unkind than it tended to drift when talking to Cassidy, though, and if it weren’t for the surprised look on her face at Cassidy cooperating without protest, she might’ve almost managed a smile as she said, “I’ll get some coffee on,” and exited the attic.

By the time Emily was pulling mugs out of the cabinet for herself, Cassidy, and eventually Jesse, she could faintly hear some banging and a string of multilingual curses coming from the direction of the attic stairs. She ignored it, though, busying herself with the coffee until Cassidy made his way in through the common room, leaning through the pass through window and taking one of the mugs sat out on the sil. 

"Think I got all the boxes down and sittin' in the chapel," he said, taking a sip of coffee and wishing there was whiskey in it.  He thought for a brief moment, then smirked just a little, continuing, "Don't know what's in any of 'em, but if you wanna put up some mistletoe 'fore Jess wakes up, you'd probably be able to catch him rounding that corner to the bathroom."

The usual slightly displeased look Emily wore around Cassidy returned then. "We're not putting up any mistletoe in the /church/."

"No, see, you'd be putting it up in the /rectory/," Cassidy protested, and after a moment of particularly harsh displeasing stare, elaborated, "Jesse tried to 'set boundaries' at one point. It all fell apart pretty quick once he realized that the bathroom was in 'his' part of the building, and I mean, what self-respecting grown man can't pick a lock and get in where he's not supposed to anyway?"

Emily just focused on her coffee, making a concentrated effort to not glare any harder at Cassidy for fear of the eye strain, until she was started by the sound of a door opening.

Jesse blearily walked out of his bedroom, mostly dressed and ready to ignore Cassidy's greeting of "Mornin' sunshine!" beyond giving him a glance of fond annoyance until he realized Emily was standing there with him. "...Good morning. What are you two up to?" 

"Christmas decoratin'!" Cassidy replied cheerily.

"I figured I'd at least get the boxes down, get started on it this morning. Miles took the kids for me 'til one, and it's just easier to get things set up without them running around," Emily explained as she filled the last mug and held it out for Jesse.

"Right, right," Jesse nodded, making his way into his kitchen and taking the mug and a very large sip from it, "I, uh, should be working on Sunday's sermon. So I'll leave that fun to you. Thanks for putting the coffee on." With that, the preacher was turning and walking, well, just back to the desk in the living room, as there wasn't a lot of room to disappear in the rectory, but the intent was clear enough.

Cassidy gave Emily a concerned look,  but she just shook her head a little. "Alright, well, we're going to get started. We shouldn't be too loud or anything, so we won't bother you," she said simply in Jesse's direction before setting her coffee down and heading out to the chapel, Cassidy following at her heels.

Once in the privacy of the chapel, Cassidy frowned as Emily started to open boxes. "You'd think a preacher would be a little more into the holiday spirit, wouldn't ya?" he commented, leaning against a pew.

"Yeah. I... I don't know. There's a lot of things I don't know about him..." she admitted, pulling out a knotted pile of tinsel garland and setting it aside.

"He's a good bloke," Cassidy said softly, looking at the mess for some time as Emily continued unpacking before finally taking one end of a piece of it and starting the untangling process, "but he is a bit mysterious, I do have to say."

Emily nodded a bit wearily, but nearly managed a smile at Cassidy before returning her attention to digging through boxes.

* * *

 

As the day went on, Jesse poked his head into the chapel to tell Cassidy and Emily he had errands to run, and once he'd left, the radio was turned on and although they didn't really interact beyond asking the other to hold something or help find the end of a garland or strand of lights, the remaining two went about decorating with slightly more merriment. 

Several dozen Command hooks, two more pots of coffee, and a 'joking' explanation about fair Irish skin in sunlight later, the church was decked with artificial wreaths on every pew plus one outside on the steeple, a tree in the corner - decorated ...lovingly… by Emily’s children after Miles dropped them off - and lights and/or garland outlining pretty much every other surface in the common room and chapel.  Cassidy bid Emily and her family a good evening, apologizing for some choice words he’d accidentally used in front of them, and waited for Jesse to return.

It wasn’t long after Emily had left that Jesse did so, making a less than pleased face at the smoky haze drifting up from one of the pews as he walked through the chapel.

“Emily say to tell you she’ll be here early tomorrow morning to talk to you about something or another. Kiddos were getting restless so she split before you got back,” Cassidy said as the preacher came into view from where he’d laid down on a pew, something that Jesse was going to be generous and assume was a cigarette hanging from his lips and a bottle of whiskey on the floor next to him.

“I know, I got her text,” Jesse said with a nod, continuing seamlessly to, “What have I said about smoking in my church?”

Cassidy laughed a bit to himself, “Probably something about not doing it, I’m guessing. But it ain’t like you don’t do it, too.”

Jesse stopped halfway to reaching into his pocket for his pack of cigarettes and thought for a moment before pulling it out anyway. “It’s my church.”

“And I live here, too,” Cassidy pointed out.

“For now, at least,” Jesse grumbled, catching the lighter that Cassidy had pulled out and tossed to him when he’d started patting at his own pockets trying to locate one.

“Oh come on now, don’t be like that,” Cassidy huffed, sitting upright to make room on the pew and holding out the whiskey bottle to Jesse, “You’re too good a Christian and I’m too charming for you to kick me out on my arse.”

Rolling his eyes, Jesse took the bottle and sat down, knocking back more than a little of the liquid inside. “I don’t know how right you are about any of that.”

“I’m almost impossibly right on all of that. Trust me,” Cassidy replied cheekily, stealing the bottle back when Jesse nearly snorted in disbelief. After a healthy swallow of liquor for himself, he turned his attention to Jesse. “So, the ditching on the decorating thing: are you more like the Grinch in actively hating Christmas, or is it just a sad Charlie Brown sort of seasonal depression issue?”

“Neither,” Jesse said with annoyed huff, taking a drag of his cigarette.

Cassidy frowned at that. “So what is it then, mate? I’d expect a preacher to be a little more into the birth of his Lord and Savior and all.”

“I’m into that just fine,” Jesse tried to assure, but Cassidy’s skeptical look stopped him in his tracks, “I have a… complicated relationship with, well, a lot of things, alright? The holidays are among them. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll get up there and preach about the greatest gift of all being Jesus Christ, but the rest of it...”

There was more than a little silence before Cassidy prodded at it. “You gonna elaborate on that at all?”

“No,” Jesse said simply, taking the bottle back and having a swig as he put out his cigarette on an already burned spot on the pew. “Since when are you Mr. Christmas, anyway?”

“What’s not to like about Christmas?” Cassidy asked in reply, “People open their hearts and homes and beer taps. And yeah it’s gotten more commercial over the years, but the good parts are still there under the shiny shite and people beating each other half to death for trendy presents. We ain’t reached the peace on earth thing yet, but there’s plenty of good will towards all men, y’know?”

“Wouldn’t have pegged you for the type, is all,” Jesse shrugged, handing the bottle back to Cassidy after another sip.

Cassidy shrugged in turn. “What can I say, I’m full of surprises, I guess?”

“I guess,” Jesse echoed,  “Maybe you’ve seen more of that good will towards men than I have.”

“That’ll happen when you live as long as I have. Seen more than my share of shite, too, but I wouldn’t’ve made it this long if the world was all doom and gloom and darkness.” Cassidy smiled then, noting the way Jesse rolled his eyes at the mention of his advanced age.

“‘As long as you have,’” the preacher mocked,  “right. How long has that been again?”

Cassidy rolled his eyes in turn then, but he didn’t consider it his fault that Jesse didn’t believe him when he was telling the church. “Oh, just a hundred and nineteen years. Be a hundred and twenty come the twenty-first o’ December.”

“Hundred and twenty on the twenty first,” Jesse snorted, his voice skeptical, “That’s quite a milestone, I’ll have to get you a birthday present.”

“Aw, you don’t gotta give me nothin’, Jess,” Cassidy assured, before grinning, “But on the other hand I’ve never refused a present.”

Jesse laughed then, Cassidy joining in after a moment and creating a pleasing chorus of happiness in the dark of chapel.

* * *

 

“And why, exactly, am I not in the running to be Mary?” Tulip asked, leaning against the door frame from the common room into the chapel late on Sunday afternoon, blocking Jesse from returning to the small group still left after she’d practically dragged him away by his ear.

“Tulip-” Jesse tried to begin, but he was quickly cut off.

“I’m a member of the congregation. I... love Jesus and all that shit. You’re doing a stupid ‘living nativity’ and I want to be a part of it. Where the hell do you get off telling me I can’t even put my name in the hat for the female lead?”

Jesse took a breath in through his nose, reminding himself that swearing was frowned upon in church. “You know damn well why,” he managed firmly, “and you don’t want to be a part of it, you want to annoy me, which is enough to disqualify you.”

“I don’t know anything when comes to you anymore, Jesse Custer,” Tulip said with a tone that was only as harsh as it was to cover up any hint of defeat that threatened to come through, “and you don’t know me that well anymore either that you can try to tell me why I’m doing something.”

“I know you well enough, and I know you’re not playing the Virgin Mary,” Jesse said firmly.

Tulip’s look hardened even more than before at that. “I might not be welcome to play Mary but I’m sure there’s plenty of room for you to play the ass,” she spat as she walked past, her heels stomping on the chapel floor until she practically ran into Cassidy near the doors.

“Lover’s quarrel?” he asked, a small smile on his face for a moment until sight of her glare wiped it clean off.

Tulip’s look softened just slightly at the way Cassidy almost looked sad. “You could say that,” she said, “You know they’re doing a living nativity for Christmas Eve services, right? I’m already banned from participating in it.”

“That doesn’t seem fair at all. I mean, I figured you’d be disqualified on the basis of not being a virgin, but from the way you two were talking I feel like it’s something deeper than that.”

Tulip frowned at the virgin comment, but Cassidy moved on too swiftly for her to interject to scold him, and she wasn’t really keen on talking sex with him anyway, so she just nodded. “There is. Jesse has his reasons, I just didn’t think he’d have the balls to tell me no outright in front of everyone like he did. I’m just trying to get him to pull his head out of his ass and get back on the road with me.”

Cassidy nodded, going to reach out and touch Tulip’s arm comfortingly, but he thought better of it as he saw the look already forming on her face in response to his movement, so he ran his hand through his own hair in attempt at a save. “I get you want him gone with you, but can you really ask a shepherd to abandon his flock at Christmastime? Especially when we’re really layering the metaphors here. Or mixing ‘em. Or maybe I’m doing both. You know, I don’t know why you’re not supposed to do that, if that’s the thing you’re not supposed to do that I’m thinking of…”

One of Tulip’s least favorite things to do was admitting someone else was right when it came to something she was doing. But she had to admit that Cassidy might have been, and considering how he was rambling, he might have been pretty high as well, so she didn’t see much harm in letting him know that. “You have a point. I can let him have his stupid shitty nativity play in his stupid shitty church. And it can go awfully and make him realize he should just leave this town behind without my being a part of it.”

“Exactly,” Cassidy agreed, grinning even more than he usually did when looking at Tulip as he watched her walk away.

* * *

 

Wednesday night nativity play rehearsal was going terribly, as Tulip had predicted the whole process would, which was much to her delight, even if she kept it to herself mostly unless she was alone with Jesse or Cassidy. Cassidy took her pride in that much better than Jesse did.

Regardless of how it was going, Cassidy had cleared out of the way of it, as he had in previous weeks.  He’d sat in on the first rehearsal and removed himself before he could laugh at anything inappropriately or get roped into filling in for someone who dropped out after learning that poor arsefaced boy was being allowed to participate (from what little Cassidy had seen, though, the kid made a fine shepherd, regardless of his lack of popularity and the fact it was hard to understand a damn word he said). This particular day, though, he actually had plans rather than just trying to avoid being part of the trainwreck and not annoy Jesse too much. Granted, those plans were just drinking away the sorrows that come with the knowledge of all you loved who you’ve outlived and that you’re only going to outlive more of them and putting enough heroin into his arm to kill at least one entire genre of music, but they were plans nonetheless.

Those plans, however, were interrupted somewhere between cheap bottle of whiskey number three and hit number two of the night, by a knock at the attic door. Cassidy was tempted to ignore it, but then he heard Jesse’s voice from the other side of the wood and he couldn’t.

“Cassidy? You in there?”

His eyes went a little wide as he scrambled to hide his kit beneath his pillow and make it look like he hadn’t drank all the empties laying around in as rapid succession as he had, but he yelled back, “Yeah. Need something, Jesse?” as soon as he had.

“Just to talk to you for a minute. Nothing bad,” the preacher replied.

Another moment later, Cassidy had managed to haul himself up off the mattress and to the door, unlocking it and smiling at the sight of Jesse. “Hey.”

Jesse returned the smile, even if there was an edge of concern to it, able to smell the alcohol on Cassidy’s breath very well from as far away as he was. “Hey, I figured you’d be out celebrating by now...”

“No,” Cassidy said with a small shake of his head that was quickly aborted when it made the world spin, “Quiet night in, y’know. They’re havin’ a bit of a Christmas party at the whorehouse on Friday and I figure I should save my money for when I head out to that.”

“Oh, that makes sense,” Jesse said, holding back a look a of disapproval at the mention of the whorehouse - it was Cassidy’s birthday, after all, he could be nice and nonjudgmental for a day. He held out a small, messily wrapped package, then, still smiling at Cassidy. “I should’ve given this to you earlier, but you know, Wednesdays can be kind of a mess and it slipped my mind. But here you go. Happy birthday, Cassidy.”

Cassidy took the gift, a grin already spread across his face at the fact that Jesse had not only remembered him but had even gotten him a gift. It was wrapped in inside out Christmas paper, but he didn’t mind one bit as he tore through it and revealed his present: a copy of Justin Bieber’s  _ Believe  _ on CD. Between the gift and the drugs in his system, Cassidy was more than a little overwhelmed with emotion. “You really are my best mate,” he managed to slur, on the verge of tears as he pulled Jesse into a tight hug that obviously caught him by surprise.

Jesse tried to pull away but it was very quickly clear that Cassidy had not intentions of letting go, so he just let it happen, patting Cassidy’s back lightly a few times. “You’re welcome, Cass.” He looked over the other man’s shoulder and saw the mostly empty liquor bottle next to Cassidy’s mattress and couldn’t help but be a little concerned, wondering how full it had been just earlier that day and if Cassidy needed someone to keep an eye on him. “You wanna come downstairs, uh, listen to that, have some beers with me?”

He didn’t exactly understand what Cassidy said in response, but he took the way he felt like the air was going to be squeezed out of him and the enthusiastic kiss to his cheek as a yes and did his best to guide him down the stairs.

Cassidy had passed out after another beer, his head resting against Jesse’s shoulder before the chorus of “Catching Feelings” but he still easily counted it as the best birthday he’d had in at least forty years.

* * *

 

“Full house out there tonight, eh?” Cassidy said, looking out the door of the common room and into the chapel as people milled around and found their seats, his usual spot in the back already taken up by families with fussy children. His eyes scanned the crowd, seeing familiar faces from Sundays and others from places far from church services, and even more he didn’t recognize, and he couldn’t help but keep an eye on Emily at the organ, hoping she didn’t go through her sheet music and notice that he may have slipped a… less traditional Christmas song or two into with her standards.

“It’s Christmas Eve, Cassidy,” Jesse said as he glanced out in turn, “Only bigger day is Easter.” He took a deep breath and glanced back to the cast of the living nativity, then to Cassidy again. “You happen to see Tulip out there anywhere?”

Cassidy nodded. “Aye, she’s out there, saw her earlier. Why?”

Jesse sighed a very tired sigh. “Our Virgin Mary is apparently two months pregnant and can’t stop throwing up long enough to make it through services.”

At first Cassidy nodded again but then he paused, going to ask and then realizing what that had to do with Tulip being there. “So you want to ask Tulip to fill in? You know you’re never gonna live that down for as long as you live, right? Not to mention I wouldn’t blame her one bit if she flat out said no.”

“I know,” Jesse admitted, “but she was the one who wanted to be involved in the first place. Go out and tell her I want to talk to her, please?”

“You’ll owe me for it,” Cassidy warned.

Jesse looked back at Cassidy with an unamused expression. “I let you live here rent free, and my air conditioner  _ still _ isn’t fixed.”

“...Alright we’re even.” And with that, Cassidy slipped out the door and searched through the crowd to find Tulip. She wasn’t hard to find, never one to blend in too thoroughly with a crowd, and once he made his way too her, he tapped her on the shoulder. “Jesse wants to speak with you, love.”

“It’s about something stupid, isn’t it?” Tulip asked with a soft huff.

“Aye,” Cassidy admitted with a commiserative look.

Tulip shook her head to herself but stood up. “Save my spot for me,” she said, pausing for a short second before leaning up to kiss Cassidy’s cheek, “Merry Christmas, Cassidy.”

His smile could’ve lit up a whole city block once those lips hit his cheek and he barely managed a, “Merry Christmas to you, too, Tulip,” before she disappeared into the crowd, headed to find Jesse.

He was honestly a little surprised when Tulip didn’t return to her seat by the time services started, but Cassidy had his fair share of lost bets with better odds, so he shrugged it off, leaning back as well as the pew would allow and watching the evening unfold.

Cassidy had seen better nativity plays in his one hundred and twenty years, but this one, with its Virgin Mary staring daggers at the preacher narrating the scene with a voice that could hold the Word of God, an arsefaced shepherd, and brief musical interludes of piano arrangements of modern classics such as “Mistletoe” and “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight Tonight)” was far from the worst.


End file.
